Decided today would be as good a day as any to write a post. Been lazy obviously, for the past few days. Had a thought a few days back to write a post on each of my issues and analyze them. Maybe next time.
So it was/has been a decent end of the week. Work got done (kinda), had a decent jamming session. Had an amazon delivery, got new wheels for my surfskate deck (re: new hobby). But as I headed out today, I just had this feeling of meh-ness. Ennui maybe? Not sure what's a good word to describe it. Not happy or contented definitely. Tried to remind myself of the things that had gone right this weekend, but I just brushed those off with a "Yeah, I suppose." I guess, subtly, or rather in the back of my head, the problem is the worry of completing the children's book project that put a damper on the weekend. And I felt guilty that I didn't start on it today like I told myself I would. That's prob it. And prob also the realization at the shop yesterday, that even though I bought so much gear, and try to talk the talk, I'm still a mediocre or worse skater. The issue isn't that I want to be a good skater, it's just that I am reminded of all the things in my life, that I am mediocre at. I am, the jack of all trades.
Must be conscious of adding paragraph breaks. Look at me, trying to come up with topics to write about, thinking of the words to put in. Trying hard to make this work, instead of it... I dunno. Lost my train of thought.
Get something done tomo John. Maybe the dopamine will hit.
